Rivalry
by Mournful Storms
Summary: The Jounin are rivals; sort of. They really, really want to know who is best and maybe have some fun while they're at it. Therefore, their unfortunate genin,and Shikamaru the Chuunin, are dragged into the intense competition! On Hiatus
1. Jounin: My team is better than yours

**_Disclaimer_ **_is needed:** I do not own Naruto, Kishimoto Masashi-san does**_  
_Um...-snicker- I really don't know what I was thinking...but enjoy what I come up with. I'm hoping to have a steady update stream of once a week...but who knows?  
Okay, so...All will be explained in time and all reviews will be answered in time. :D I just hope you read this.  
I told you I'd come up with something...and I'm sorry for neglecting all the other poor widdle stories._**_

* * *

_****_My team is better than your team!_**

It all started with the argument.

"My team is the best!" Roared Gai furiously. "They all have the power of youth!"

"My team is the best!" Argued Asuma, his cigarette nearly falling out of his mouth. "I have a Chuunin on my team!"

"No, my team is best!" said Kakashi. "I have the last survivor of the Uchiha clan!"

"My team is best!" Kurenai chipped in. "They…well, we have Shino and teamwork!"

Everyone stared at her.

"I have an idea." Said Kakashi. "Since I'm bored and we need to find out whose team is best, let's have a series of competitions to figure it out."

"Yes!" Kurenai cackled, eager to redeem herself. "And it will cause unnecessary harm to our students!"

"Okay, stop that." Said Asuma. "Now you're just even more weird."

Kurenai sulked.

"Let's only cause them a slight bit of trouble." Said Kakashi. "Because if they're permanently scarred, they won't be the best teams. Of course, there can only be one BEST TEAM EVER."

Everyone agreed this was a good plan. So, they called out all their students.

The first team to arrive was Gai's team.

"HA!" said Gai. "My students have won the first challenge, having the power of youth and the youthfulness to be on time!"  
(Maybe I'm making unnecessary comments about his Youth obsession, but this is how it went.)

All the others sulked. Kakashi pouted, because he knew that if he called out his team they wouldn't bother coming early or even on time.

Kurenai's team came second, because they had to stop by the Hyuuga compound and deal with Hinata's scary father to get her out.

Asuma's team was third, because they had to drag Shikamaru out of bed.

Finally, half and hour late, Kakashi' team arrived.

"What?" Naruto looked around in surprise. "I thought it was just Kakashi-sensei and he would be late!"

Kakashi smirked. _Victory…_ Then he realized he lost the competition and went back to sulking.

"Why did you call us out here?" said Neji impatiently. "I could be training with my FATHER. A worthy opponent."

Neji was lying. He secretly knew he was better than Hiashi, but he decided that he seemed conceited enough already.

"Right." Asuma cleared his throat. "We have called you out here to start a competition. The competition will be to decide-"

"Who's team is best." Said Gai, interrupting. Asuma glared at him, angry that all the glory was stolen.

Immediately Lee was pumped. "YOSH! This sounds very youthful! My teammates and I will win for sure!"

Immediately Sasuke wanted to win, just to beat Lee. "We're going to win." He told his team.

Naruto scoffed, although he was thinking the same thing. Sakura stared at Sasuke, giggling. "Of course, Sasuke-kun!"

Upon hearing this Sasuke fell into his inferiority complex (As will be explained) because he knew they would lose thanks to Sakura.

"You will be glad to know," said Kakashi. "That not all the competitions will be with your own teammates. There will also be a competition to see who is the best out of all of you. It will require some looking underneath the underneath to win both competitions."

Sasuke was glad again, as this meant he had a chance of winning one of the competitions.

Shino pushed his glasses up. Immediately team Kurenai knew it was _on_.

"We'll win! Ne, Hinata?" said Kiba.

"Ah…y-yes." Said Hinata nervously, glancing over at Naruto. _But I really want Naruto-kun to win too…but my teammates depend on me... what should I do?_

Hinata's head exploded from the pressure.

Nope, just joking. LOL. Hinata blushed slightly and looked back over at the Jounin.

"Okay, this will take a lot of hard work on your part." Said Asuma. "And it will be the most difficult competition EVER. The first competition essentially determines the winners and losers of the Team Teamwork Competition."

Everyone was pumped…until they heard that. "The team what?"

"The Team Teamwork competition." Said Kakashi. "We are going to split up each team so no one is with their regular teammates. Then we will make you live with your new teammates for two days. We are giving each of you a password and no way to communicate with your real teammates. Whichever real team has all three members with all the passwords of their real teammates wins. Oh, and your password has something to do with you or your teammates."

Everyone was a little worried about what would happen, but didn't argue.

"So, basically…" said Neji slowly. "You just want to drive us crazy by putting us in the worst possible groups to kill each other."

"Maybe…" said Gai evasively. "All of you, go home and become prepared!"

"Hai, Gai-sensei!" Shouted Lee, running off at the speed of light. Not really, but close enough.

* * *

_Um...haha?  
Storms_


	2. Genin:My Teamwork is better than yours

_A _**Disclaimer **_is necessary: **I do not own Naruto, Kishimoto Masashi-san does**_  
_-glare- I was saving this chapter for the actual update day (Sunday or Monday) but as some people couldn't wait...I'm putting it out now. Be grateful, minna! (Joking)_**_

* * *

_****_My Teamwork is better than your Teamwork!_**

"Okay…" Kurenai cackled evilly. "Let's think up the teams."

"We're not putting Hinata with Neji." Said Kakashi immediately. "That would be cruel and potentially end in death."

"Okay…How about Neji, Sakura, Kiba and Chouji?" suggested Asuma. "None of them really know each other, but are bound to get irritated."

"Good idea!" said Gai. The Jounin enjoyed a hearty chuckle at their clever idea before returning to work.

Eventually, the teams were made up.

Neji, Sakura, Kiba, Chouji Team 1

Lee, Sasuke, Hinata, Ino Team 2

TenTen, Naruto, Shino, Shikamaru Team 3

"Yes!" said Kurenai. She picked up the list and rushed off to the clearing as they all zoomed over to meet their teams.

"We added something else." Kakashi said before mentioning the teams. "For each original thing you do to get your password to your teammates, we award your REAL team one point. For everything you do that makes us laugh or that is amazing, you get a point. Work hard, everyone!"

Everyone was shocked at the teams, but didn't dare argue.

Sasuke shuddered. _Ino…?_

Neji shuddered. _I'm with stupid people…_

The people on team 3 didn't know what to say. No one really knew TenTen due to her undeveloped character, and all the others got along reasonably well with the exception of Shino who was as social as a tree.

Soon they were put into separate houses. Team 1 was given their passwords.

"Since none of us want each others passwords…" said Kiba. "How about we tell each other?"

No one objected, so Kiba went first. Opening his paper, he frowned as he saw the word.

"Um…Obnoxious?"

Sakura went second. "I got Emo…" she looked blank. "I don't get it."

Neji unraveled his, which was shaped as an Origami crane. "Damn you Gai…I got Youthfulness."

Chouji opened his. A tear trickled down his face. "I got Diet."

Immediately everyone felt bad for him and comforted him while shaking their fists at the heavens and cursing whoever wrote that down.

"Why do I have the feeling Kakashi-sensei wrote our passwords?" said Sakura slowly.

"Okay…let's ignore the offensive comments on these pieces of paper and concentrate on how to get them to our teammates." Said Neji, shivering slightly.

We leave team 1 to their sadness and make our way to team 2, who had a similar idea.

They told each other their passwords.

"I have gotten…Rival." Said Lee. "How fitting!"

"I got…Knucklehead." Said Sasuke. He thought of Naruto.

"Um…I-I got Watching…" said Hinata shyly.

"I got Stalker!" said Ino proudly. "I wonder why?"

"Oh yes, I wonder…" muttered Sasuke under his breath. He resolved to think up a plan to eliminate Ino permanently.

After they got out of this house.

Moving on to team 3…who are doing the same thing! My, are they all telepathic or just really, really predictable?

"I got…Boring." Said TenTen. She frowned. "That's not fair."

"I got…Short." Said Naruto. "I'm not that much shorter than Sasuke and Sakura-chan!"

"I have Tree." Said Shino. He did nothing, but everyone knew he was cursing the heavens at that moment.

"I have…Lazy." Said Shikamaru. He shrugged. "I kind of figured."

Meanwhile, the Jounin were watching the teams, cackling evilly. How did they watch them all at once? I don't know. Maybe their MAGICAL JOUNIN POWERS helped.

"Well, I'm bored…" said Kurenai.

"Let's have a 'we are Jounin' party!" cheered Gai.

They thought it was a good idea and commenced the partying.

---Team 1---  
Neji used his Byakugan and located his teammates. He also estimated it would be fairly easy to use a Kawarimi to give the password to his teammates…but what to switch?

Snickering, he switched Lee's spandex with the password and a note saying he'd give him TenTen's password later.

Everyone in Konoha heard the screams that followed.

"MY EYES! MY DELICATE SHARINGAN EYES!"

"I-Itai…are my eyes bleeding? Eep!"

"SASUKE-KUN! SAVE MEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

Neji shrugged, grinning. Then he dropped the spandex on the floor and left his horrified teammates standing in the room.

Immediately the others copied him, although they replaced the notes with other, trivial things.

Gai chuckled. "My team has one point for figuring out a way to get the passwords. Neji has all three, because of his Byakugan and he has given one to Lee with a Replacement Jutsu. That's team Gai, 2-0-0-0"

No one could argue and simply hoped their teams would be up to par with this.

TenTen could not use the same technique Neji had, as the Jounin decided to impose that as a rule. She used one of her awesome jutsu to send it through the walls into Lee and Neji's houses, now that she knew where they were.

How is that possible? Well, we don't know TenTen so maybe it is and no one told us yet.

Finally, their whole team had the passwords. But that makes the rest of the competition kind of pointless and there would be no suffering (Aside from team 2) so the Jounin decided that all teams must finish before being let out.

"For gods sakes." Neji snarled. "I did my part, now hurry up."

Kiba managed to use a Kawarimi to send his password to Shino. Shino copied down the password and sent a message to Kiba with his before sending his bugs to Hinata's house. Hinata copied down the other two passwords before giving the bugs hers. They were sent to Kiba with her password and finally to Shino.

"My team comes in second!" said Kurenai. "Although Gai got one more point because his team member scarred everyone mentally…I have three points! Second place, yeah! 4-3-0-0!"

Asuma's team was to come in third, thanks to Shikamaru. He used that brain of his to send his shadow slowly to Chouji, and made his write down the password. Then he did the same to Ino and also made her write down her instructions. Ino then used her jutsu to possess Chouji and took his password and wrote down hers. Then she possessed Shikamaru and wrote down her password and Chouji's before writing them down on her own piece of paper.

"Darn…third again." Said Asuma. "This is becoming quite repetitive. And I only got two points because Chouji didn't do anything. 4-3-2-0"

Kakashi groaned.

Unlike the other teams, Team 7 had no useful abilities whatsoever besides destructive ones. Sasuke could only destroy things, Naruto could only replicate himself and destroy things, and Sakura was totally useless beyond the most basic abilities.

They were doomed to never finish the challenge.

Eventually Sakura just used the Replacement technique so many times that they soon all had the passwords.

"My team seriously managed to only get one point." Kakashi frowned. "Wow.4-3-2-1." How quaint! Each team lowly decreased in pointage. Is pointage a word? I will never know.

Although they comforted him, the other Jounin laughed at Kakashi on the inside.

"This is what you get for being so hip, my rival!" whispered Gai joyfully.

"Okay, well…" Kakashi sighed. "My team botched it up again. Let's let them out."

Everyone was happy to be let out. Although team 2 was essentially half blind now, they would recover.

"Okay…once again, Team Gai is first, Team Kurenai is second, Team Asuma is third and Team Kakashi is last!"

Everyone cheered, frowned or shrugged. You can guess.

Except Shino who is somewhat like a tree with no emotions.

Although, mind you, he is a _smart _tree.

"Okay, well…that was only the beginning!" said Kurenai. "We can't have it ending so soon! There are many more teamwork competitions, and then many other competitions as well!"

"What other teamwork competitions?" Whispered Kakashi.

"I don't know." She whispered back. "But think of something quick!"

Interrupting their party, the Jounin sensei had a quick conference before deciding.

"Now we're going to test your teamwork with other people, not on your team!" said Kakashi. "Simply because you all rather disappointed us in the previous challenge."

Everyone glared at team 7.

"Okay, the first team is…Neji, Sasuke, Shikamaru and Shino! Can you guess what team they are? They're team Genius!"

"Of course." Said everyone, rolling their eyes.

"Next is Lee, Naruto, um…Chouji and Hinata! They are team Hard Workers! Or, if you prefer, team Middle!"

They sort of cheered, throwing a small party to celebrate their hard work.

"And finally, it's the Team that is full of everyone else! TenTen, Sakura, Ino and Kiba! You guys are team Weak Team Friends, or the WTF team!"

They sort of sulked.

"Okay, now that our teams have been established, you are going to have competitions, obviously! We will pit you against each other in three challenges, each one with one team with an advantage! The first challenge is a challenge of wits and talent, the second of pure physical labour, and the third of random knowledge and abilities!" said Kurenai.

"Great…" said everyone. Sarcastically, of course.

"Okay, let's start with the first challenge!" cheered Asuma. "You each have to demonstrate an ability and how it can be used and useful OUTSIDE of battle!"

Immediately they set to work.

"My Sharingan can be used to copy things that I need to learn." Said Sasuke bluntly.

"My Byakugan can be used to…find lost objects." Said Neji, refusing to say the use everyone was thinking of. Perverts.

"My intelligence can be used for…basically everything that requires even a little thinking." Said Shikamaru bluntly.

"My bugs can be used to help gardens grow." Said Shino.

"Whatever." Neji shrugged. "We're Geniuses. We don't need to win the competition to know we're superior."

Let me explain something before we continue. It is about the Inferiority and Superiority complexes.

The Superiority complex is one that Neji, Sasuke and Shino have. Basically, to sum it up for all you people who do not have a twisted, roundabout way of thinking, it is when they think they're better than everyone else. This often makes them rather cocky in battle, knowing that they're better than everyone else is.

The Inferiority complex is one you may have guessed already. The only one who has this is Sasuke. When he becomes too cocky because of his Superiority complex, he may lose a fight. This throws him into his Inferiority complex. Yup, you guessed it. He thinks he's not as good as some people. Then Sasuke will do the unmanly thing and challenged someone weaker than himself to a fight. Usually, it will be Naruto, as Sasuke ignores the overflowing potential Naruto unleashes during fights. Beating Naruto brings Sasuke back up into his Superiority complex and then he's normal again.

Neji does not have an Inferiority complex because – Well, have you ever seen him completely lost a fight (Aside from with Naruto)? No! Neji does not lose enough to need one. He is perfectly find KNOWING he is a genius and he surpasses everyone else.

Shino does not have one either, simply because – Well, have you ever seen Shino lose a fight AT ALL? Maybe so, but I do not remember one! Shino rocks, even in his treelike state! And thus Shino does not need an Inferiority complex either.

Shikamaru…well, he's too lazy to bother with either one. He's content just knowing he's smart. Good ol' Shikamaru.

But on with the story!

"Oh, no…" moaned Chouji. "My jutsu…well…um…it can be used to break someone's fall!"

"Yeah!" said Naruto enthusiastically. "And my jutsu can be used if I need to be in two places at once or need a helping hand!"

"My jutsu…" Hinata stuttered. "I can find lost objects." You see? None of the Hyuuga acknowledge the perverted side of the jutsu and have come to a mutual agreement that the Byakugan is good for finding stuff.

"Um…My taijutsu can help because I can do many chores and deliver messages quickly with my speed!" said Lee, his eyes burning with the flames of YOUTH!

"Great…" said Naruto uneasily.

Team WTF was busy wondering what skills half of them had.

"My knives…can cut vegetables." Said TenTen lamely.

"My random nothing skills make me a perfect example of a normal person!" said Sakura. "I could blend in perfectly on a spy mission!"

"My flower skills, of course, help in the flower shop!" said Ino.

"And my super nose can help me track down lost pets, or children or anything!" said Kiba. "And Akamaru's cute!"

"Arf!" said Akamaru, which translates roughly into 'Your team is stupid. Let's go.'

"Oh, Akamaru." Said Kiba, chuckling warmly as everyone stared at him.

"OKAY!" said Gai. "It's time to show off your skills and tell us what they do!"

Neji stepped out first. He used the Byakugan. "I can find lost objects."

And…so on. Are we really going to go through this all again? NO. Let's see what our judges…ahem, Jounin have to say.

"Um…Team Genius has PRETTY good skills." They said. The Geniuses looked offended.

"JK!" said Kurenai. "Your skills pwn. You win!"

"Enough with the netspeak." Said Neji. "It is irritating to our superior minds."

"I'll 'superior' you!" growled Kurenai.

"It's that time of the month, isn't it?" whispered Gai. Asuma nodded and told everyone to be good.

"Um…team Middle has…well, middle skills. Actually, they have the most practical ones but not the most flashy and impressive skills."

"Team WTF…You people seriously need to learn something new." Said Kakashi. "It was boring. Sakura, you suck. Maybe I'll teach you Chidori just to feel better."

"HEY!" said Naruto. "Teach me first!"

"NO. You already have a cool jutsu." Said Kakashi. "Go away."

"Well…onto the next competition!" said Asuma. "Physical labor! How long can you last? This is slightly individual, too. Whichever team has the most people who stay in the longest wins!"

Kiba raised his hand. "Um…can we forfeit?"

"No." said Kurenai. "You have a tiny fraction of a chance! Go for it!"

Kiba didn't want to offend her so he reluctantly participated.

After the first few hours people dropped out like flies. Well, not EXACTLY like flies, but...you know.

Sakura, Ino, Chouji, Shikamaru, and TenTen all dropped out soon.

After nearly killing herself, Hinata had to admit defeat. "G-Gomen, everyone. I'm sorry I couldn't keep up."

"Aw, it's okay Hinata-chan!" said Naruto. Lee and Chouji assured her it was okay, too.

"We can go for ages!" Lee added. "Surely we have a chance!"

The second wave brought Kiba.

"Team Genius still has three people!" said Kurenai, narrating. "And team Hard Workers isn't far behind with two people!"

"Sasuke, drop out." Said Neji. "We'll win without you using genius dirty tricks that you don't want to be a part of."

"Don't use tricks." Said Sasuke, dropping out FOR THE SAKE OF HIS TEAM. And he was bored.

After an intense session of glaring, panting and work, only Neji and Lee were left.

After another fifteen hours during which everyone had slept and eating and anything else necessary, Neji quit.

"It's not worth it." He said.

"Team Middle wins!" said Kurenai.

Team Genius shrugged. It really wasn't worth more than a day's worth of effort.

"That was pointless and tiring." Said Kiba. "How unfair."

"Too bad." Asuma stuck out his tongue. "Now it's the random skills contest! You will all reveal random skills that have nothing to do with ninja-ing! Whoever has the most surprising skills on their team wins!"

Team Genius stepped up to the plate.

"I cook." Said Sasuke. "And I can sing."

"I play Shougi." Said Shikamaru. "And I have a great fashion sense."

"I can imitate trees." Said Shino. "And I do have a body under the coat."

"I can knit." Muttered Neji. "And I dance."

Everyone gasped at all these secrets. Then team Middle – Or do they prefer team Hard Workers? – Stepped up.

"I buy other foods than Ramen!" said Naruto. "And I can make people happy by doing nothing!"

"I-I bake." Said Hinata. "A-and I can m-make imitation d-dolls of e-everybody."

"I can make other types of spandex clothes!" said Lee. "And I'm a great hair stylist!"

"I know every type of food known to man!" said Chouji. "And I know how to make beautiful valentines."

"That's…nice…" said Kakashi slowly. The Jounin sort of clapped. "Okay, team WTF. You're up."

"I know my flowers." Said Ino. "And I have the best fashion sense EVER." She glared at Shikamaru.

"I didn't dye my hair pink, and it can change colors." Said Sakura. "Also, I can make voodoo dolls."

"I can take care of dogs very well." Said Kiba. "And I can tattoo people."

"I can put hair up into perfect buns." Said TenTen. "And I make friends easily."

"Great…" said Asuma. "Okay, for most surprising skills…Neji, Shino, Shikamaru, Naruto, Lee, and Sakura! Why? Neji can dance and knit, Shino has a body, Shikamaru has a fashion sense, Naruto buys other foods than ramen, Lee is a hair stylist, and Sakura's hair changes color and she makes voodoo dolls."

"Out of these people, the REALLY surprising ones were Neji, Shino and Naruto. Sakura is just creepy." Said Kakashi.

Sakura went off to cry in a corner.

"Now, team Genius has the most surprising people with random skills, so they win! AGAIN!"

Team Genius was above cheering, but did a cool secret handshake they made up RIGHT THEN.

"Curse you!" said the Hard Workers, shaking their fists.

Team WTF just sort of…gave up.

"Well, that's it for this time!" said Asuma. "Go recover, as we will start competitions again next week!"

* * *

_I really need to get a life, don't I?  
Storms_

_P.S The score competition-wise and Jounin-wise is 2 for Gai, 0 for all the other Jounin.  
The score competition-wise for the Genin Teams is 2 for the Geniuses, 1 for the Hard Workers and 0 for the WTF team._


	3. Geniuses: My Genius is better than yours

_Whoops, better put in the **Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, Kishimoto Masashi-san does. Blech.**  
Uh-huh, I'm awesome. Not. But this is not so bad. Although I'm trying my best to make a long one, I just can't seem to find the inspiration! I'm sorry! -sob-**

* * *

****My Genius is better than your Genius!**_

"Okay…" the Jounin were plotting again. "We each have a genius, right? Whose genius is best?"

"MINE was rookie of the year AND Prodigy of his clan AND most powerful genin AND is really popular with girls AND is youthful AND his name is Hyuuga Neji, which sounds cool."

"Yeah? MINE was also rookie of the year AND sole survivor of his clan AND knows the Chidori AND is really, really popular with girls AND is cool AND his name is Uchiha Sasuke."

"So? MINE is the most intelligent AND smartest of his clan AND has a not-girlfriend in the Sand AND has saved everyone with his plans AND is great at pretending AND is a Chuunin AND his name is Nara Shikamaru, which is bomb."

"Oh really? MINE is actually most suited for combat AND the heir to his clan AND has awesome glasses AND has bug clones AND has done a lot for his comrades AND is really creepy AND seems like a tree AND he knows everything that's going on AND his name is Aburame Shino, which strikes fear into everyone's heart."

"Stop lying, Kurenai. It doesn't."

"Yes it does."

"Does not."

"Does so."

"Does not."

"Does so!"

"Does not!"

"Does so!"

"SHUT UP and continue plotting!" interrupted Kakashi. "Kurenai and Asuma, don't even start with your stupid little married couple arguments. Gai, I cannot believe you made us speak like you."

"Kakashi, get on with it." Said Gai, as he was secretly ashamed.

"Okay, so…as a competition, here's what we'll do…"

"OKAY EVERYONE!" Screamed Gai. "We're going to have a competition between the Geniuses!"

"Hooray." They said with fake enthusiasm.

"Hooray!" said everyone else with real enthusiasm since it did not involve them in any way.

"Okay, well…here's the deal. We were talking yesterday and decided to make up a competition involving what we thought was good about each of the geniuses." Said Kakashi, smiling. "All of you have nothing in common except having something to do with your clans."

They all glared at each other. The Hyuuga Copyrighted Glare, The Uchiha Patented Glare, the Nara Lazy Stare, and the Aburame Flashing-Glasses Frown-Stare-Glare, which is by far the most effective because of the long name.

Everyone was intimidated by this battle of wills, but Kakashi continued bravely. "You will all…play rock paper scissors."

"WHAT?" said everyone.

"It's simple…We couldn't pick anything any of you specialize in because that would be an unfair advantage, and we didn't want something boring. Plus, part of being a Genius is turning luck in your favor."

"Destiny is on my side." Said Neji, as he prepared to start.

"Oh no, I'm gonna win." Said Sasuke. "I'm the true genius!"

Shino pushed up his glasses, and everyone knew it was _on_.

Shikamaru yawned. "Whatever."

Neji and Shino had Rock, Sasuke had Paper and Shikamaru had Scissors.

"This is pointless." Said Shikamaru. "Unless we all gang up on someone. Let's have two matches, and then one last Final match."

Everyone agreed. It was Neji versus Sasuke and Shikamaru versus Shino.

"How troublesome." Moaned Shikamaru. He had Scissors and Shino had Paper.

Shino didn't say anything, but he was all like 'No.'

Finally, Shino frowned slightly but accepted it (For, like, the first time) and left. He became so treelike that everyone forgot about him.

"Okay, whatever…" said Sasuke, going into his inferiority complex. He had Scissors and Neji had Rock.

In the finals…Neji had Paper.

Unfortunately…Shikamaru had Scissors again.

"I always stick with Scissors." Said Shikamaru. "It's too troublesome to do anything else."

And so, by pure luck, Shikamaru was the best Genius.

"Actually, it doesn't matter who won." Said Kakashi. "By an almost unanimous vote…we admitted defeat and named Neji the best Genius. But Shikamaru is most Lucky."

Everyone frowned. Except, of course, Neji. And Shino in his treelike state.

And that was the end of it.

LOL JK AGAIN! There is so much more! But not for the best Genius competition. Sorry.

* * *

_Wow...just, wow...  
__Storms_

_P.S The score competition-wise and Jounin-wise is 3 for Gai, 0 for all the other Jounin. Gai's team rocks right now.  
The score competition-wise for the Genin Teams is 2 for the Geniuses, 1 for the Hard Workers and 0 for the WTF team._


	4. Jounin: My WTM is worse than yours

_Whoops, better put in the **Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto, Kishimoto Masashi-san does. Blech.**  
Wow...This was pointless. But then again, aren't they all?**

* * *

****My Worst Team Member is worse than your Worst Team Member!**_

The Jounin sensei were having an argument similar to the last one, but this was about their worst team members. They had selected Sakura, Ino, TenTen and Hinata.

No, they are not picking on the girls or being sexist. Actually, Chouji MIGHT have been worst if it wasn't for the time with that Sound Nin…so now he's not worst. And Kiba might be worst…but for now he's not. Sorry.

The girls just happen to be the worst ninja.

"Um…we're competing to see who has the worst team member." Said Kurenai. "This is actually going to be the shortest time ever. Just think about all the useless things the girls on your team have done."

"TenTen was not useless!" said Lee.

Neji nodded. "Lee's right. She's MOST useless on our team, but she's not _really_ useless. None of us are."

Team Gai shared a moment of sunshine and Team Spirit.

"Hinata isn't useless either." Said Kiba. "Sure, she gets nervous on missions, but she's actually really talented! Right, Shino?"

Shino nodded.

Hinata glowed with happiness and they threw a mini Team Acceptance party.

"Ino is troublesome…but…well, she's more useful than Sakura." Said Shikamaru.

"No, she's not!" said Naruto. "Sakura-chan can…Actually, you're right."

Everyone agreed. Although both girls were useless, Sakura was most useless.

"Um...okay..." said Kakashi. "Since we were competing for who has the worst team member...I win!"

"It's not like we wanted to win, anyway." said Neji. "That would mean we had a useless team member and that would suck."

Team Asuma threw a Thank God We're Alive party.

Team 7 just threw all the party stuff in Sakura's face and walked away.

It's about time Naruto realized Sakura's a bad ninja, isn't it? Maybe she should become a Medic Nin…hint, hint. Wink, wink. Nudge, nudge.

* * *

_That was even more pointless than usual, but I suppose it was necessary...somehow...  
__Storms_

_P.S The score competition-wise and Jounin-wise is 3 for Gai, 1 for Kakashi, 0 for all the other Jounin.  
The score competition-wise for the Genin Teams is 2 for the Geniuses, 1 for the Hard Workers and 0 for the WTF team._


End file.
